sometimes I know

sometimes I do not.

sometimes I see

sometimes I don’t.

sometimes the bulb comes on,

sometimes it never blinks.

I have dreaded this road,

this journey,

this moment.


I knew it would come.

It had been upon

me long before I set eyes on it

though I see it not.

I’m am not caught in between,


they are caught in between me.

These rules,

the beliefs,

the values of moral and morality.


To be or not to be?

only now do I realise.


To be or not to be.


Held back by the things I

know and the things I do not.

Between questions I have asked

and questions I dare not ask.


To be or not to be?


A self loss in

this self discovery is upon me.

I fear your fears too.

But to whom shall I lose myself to?

To me, to you or to it.

If there ever was a self loss this great,

there never would be a rediscovery this lost!